Thursday, April 19, 2007

Eat Your Veggies...




Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?

MommyMelissa
: Sure, you into vegetables?

Bloodninja
: What like gardening an ****?

MommyMelissa
: Yeah, something like that.

Bloodninja
: Nuthin turns me on more, check this out

Bloodninja
: You bend over to harvest your radishes.

(pause)

MommyMelissa
: is that it?

Bloodninja
: You water your tomato patch.

Bloodninja
: Are you ready for my fresh produce?

MommyMelissa
: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?

(pause)

Bloodninja
: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... Sexily.

Bloodninja
: I ride your buttocks, like they were amber waves of grains.

MommyMelissa
: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.

Bloodninja
: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.

Bloodninja
: Damn baby your right, this s**t is HOT.

MommyMelissa
: ...

Bloodninja
: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.

MommyMelissa
: What the f**k is this madlibs? I'm outta here.

Bloodninja
: Yah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.

MommyMelissa
: whatever.

11 comments:

Amy said...

That's how it always ends up when I try to cyber, too.

Lynda said...

The eggplants always get so ignored.

Skylers Dad said...

These just get better and better!

Anonymous said...

I have some questions:
Do they cook the veggies? because the smell of boiling cabage can be very erotic, I always thought. Plus I agree what Lynda. The eggplant is very unselfish and usually ignored. It's sad really. But then again, what about the whole pepper family? Got to be careful, but boy that can be sooooo hotttt!

(Plus:"MommyMelissa: What the f**k is this madlibs? I'm outta here." that is fucking PRICELESS!)

Peter Matthes said...

I'm going to make you artichoke on it.

Trouble said...

I can't believe people block you when you are such a font of creativity.

Big Orange said...

these aren't all YOU, right?? I mean, YOU should know how to get it one with some veggies, yes??

:-)

Reg said...

Hey Boob Lady, can I use the picture at the top of this post for my own nefarious devices?

The Boob Lady said...

Amy: Me too.

Lynda: I agree. Such a beautiful vegetable.

Skylers Dad: More to come!

Anonymous: I don't think they cook them. Raw is in now. The pepper family IS hot, but I'm afraid that they would burn all my special spots.

Peter Matthes: I laughed out loud.

Trouble: HA!

Big Orange: Veggies are my specialty.

Reg: Sure thing. What will you be doing with it? ;)

Crazy Eddie said...

LMAO... love it.

I just want to ravage a bowl full of broccoli now. You done did it now...

Besos

The Boob Lady said...

Crazy Eddie: With cheese sauce? :)