Saturday, May 12, 2007


I'm looking for employees.

When one is looking for employees, one puts up a sign.

Do they not?

Anyway, I had an "Employment Opportunities Available" sign up in my window.

I guess my mistake was that I had put it on a stand, right in front of a mannequin.

Stay with me here, there's a punchline.

Last Saturday, as we're all working as usual, a woman and her husband walked by the store about three times.

I saw them look into the store each time they strolled by.

Assuming that they were making the mall laps like the rest of the people there that day, I thought nothing of it.

Until the last lap.

When they stopped in front of the window.

Pointing and laughing.

She finally comes in with hubby firmly in hand.

The following conversation ensued:

Me: "Hi there, how are you today?"

Her: "Hi, fine thanks."

Me: "Anything that I can help you with?"

Her: "Um, well, I noticed your sign in the window."

Me: "Great, are you looking?"

Her: "No. Don't you think that's kind of suggestive?"

Me: "Uhh, pardon me?"

Her: "The sign? Don't you think it's kind of suggestive??"

Me: "I'm not sure I follow. We're presently looking for employees so we put a sign in the window."

Her: "Well, it's right under a mannequin that's only wearing a bra and panty set."

Me: "I'm sure that when people see the sign, they know that we're not hiring for a mannequin or a bra model."

Her: "Well, I still think that it's rather suggestive. I think you should remove it."

Me: "I'm sorry you feel that way ma'am, but I'm sure that the people that are coming in to apply for a job are not in any way thinking that we're hiring for an armless, legless torso."

Her: ...

They both turned on their heels and left the store.

Was this a test of somekind?

Did I fail?


Anon. Blogger said...

Goof balls, Boob Lady, goof balls.

Funny story! I love your response. Imagine, "No, I'm so sorry. We didn't mean to mislead... but we are looking for employees here in the store. Oh, please understand, we didn't mean that we were looking for armless, legless torsos! Here, let me help you with your bags... and the door.... Do you need a ride home?"

Funny people - suggestive???

Skylers Dad said...

Too suggestive for the couple that will probably go home and role play "dirty old man and sexy nurse"...

The Boob Lady said...

anon blogger: I know, they were douchebags. It did give me a great story to tell though.

skylers dad: Absolutely. I agree completely. They probably went home while she pretended to be an armless, legless torso in a bra and panty set.

Reg said...

Boob Lady I applaude your efforts to provide employment to all of the legless and torso-challenged lingere models of Atlantic Canada. One day when people hear the name Boob Lady they will think "she wasn't afraid to challenge stereotypes, she was a ahead of her time". Of course you might be out of a job...


Anonymous said...

BWA HA HA HA!! When in doubt, act completely obtuse and interpret everything overwhelmingly literally with a straight face.

I'm so totally borrowing this concept when I work at Bullseye.

Lynda said...


Maybe she was thinking you rent out hookers or something?

GETkristiLOVE said...

Mannequins are funny, they always make me laugh. Not in a sexual or suggestive way, just in a funny way.

However, those people were not funny.

ThePapaDog said...

what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs with his torso just touching the lake?


Maryam in Marrakesh said...

That is such a very strange story. Ahem, I fear that their lives are not, too, fun, if you know what I mean.

PS I linked over from Stilletto Heights:-)

The Boob Lady said...

Reg: Thank you. I do try my hardest. There aren't too many jobs out there for torsos.

Big Orange: Absolutely. I can't wait to hear your stories.

Lynda: HAHA!!

GETkristiLOVE: Those people were NOT funny at all. Losers.

ThePapaDog: HAHA! I would have said Bob. :)

Maryam: I know, I get all kinds! Welcome! :)