I got Carl back.
Details to follow.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
I got Carl back.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 11:06 PM
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 11:11 PM
Friday, February 23, 2007
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 10:33 PM
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 11:15 PM
Just because I'm now seeing Chaz from the local grocery store doesn't mean that Ex-TM and I aren't friends.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 5:53 PM
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 1:09 PM
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 12:52 PM
The ice cream was expensive.
The ice cream was delicious.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 12:07 AM
The wait is over.
Don't all email me at once for one of these.
They only come a couple of times a year.
Or as many times as I can catch a frog.
It's usually tadpoles and I can't stuff them or insert a zipper can I?
Rest assured, nobody will EVER ask you to borrow money again.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 12:00 AM
Friday, February 16, 2007
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Person 2 will be in blue.
You're looking a little grey around the nuts though..
HAHA, I'm laughing out loud.
You must be smoother than a baby's ass.
Great way to avoid ingrown hairs though
I knew it.
Saggy Ball Syndrome.
You can get Bagtox for that!!
You're almost as funny as me!!
Actually not even a black one left!!!!
I'm actually going to post this as a conversation tomorrow. You know that right?
We'll see what kind of hilarious spin I can put on those emails.. You guys are fair game now.. Now that I've actually crossed that line, It's on!!!
That is all.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 10:17 PM
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 10:12 PM
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 9:54 PM
any idea how long its going to take?
Yeah, tis super cool. I almost don't want to give it back...
ha. bail and steal it
Who knows, it's just recently gotten towed, at about 4 they came to get Carl.
I know.. I'll be in f overnight. i'll need money and food.
going to mexico?
I already reserved you a place at a donkey show.
love donkey shows
I thought so. What about the sex of the donkey? Have a preference? Costumes? Props?
sailor suits and tutus
im very specific
There will be jello wrestling too.
love it. mexico is sweet
What about M?
she'll hop on a plane and meet us
Ok, after work? She'll need her passport. Or to flash her rack.
Either will do.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 4:45 PM
If you read the last post, you know that I had a premonition of sorts.
Rather, I said something, felt a certain way, and the complete opposite happened.
This, in itself, is not unusual.
Please take a moment of silence and pray for Carl.
Carl was hit today.
Carl was hit bad.
The corner of Carl's backside is pretty smashed in.
The light that used to shine from Carl's ass?
The joy I used to get from looking at Carl's rearview?
Why, you ask?
Well, it's because of a silly little man in a silly little plow.
The snow started at approximately 2:00 pm.
I know this because as I'm sitting at my computer innocently chatting with a friend, I see a plow drive by in what can only be described as what I thought was diligence in wanting to get a jump on things.
Instead, "Mr. I'm going to get out early and drive my plow truck around for no apparent reason and hit innocent little silver cars named Carl" decides to smoke my car on his way down the hill.
Apparently, this foolish little man had just come back from the local coffee shop from a "pee" and was going around the block.
Carl just got in the way.
Carl is now on his way to the repair shop.
Cold, alone, he doesn't know where he is! Don't you understand?
I'll see you soon, Carl.
I'll see you soon.
Poor innocent little Carl.
Bow your heads for Carl.
Say a little something.
There is snow!
It is NOT stormy.
I will keep you updated.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 3:28 PM
Last night while on the phone with mema at approximately 11:30 pm, I said something.
Something that I now know was foreshadowing.
"Nobody can hit my car where I'm parked! Even if we get a boatlod of snow, I'm good because nobody can hit me."
*Cue ominous music*
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 1:43 PM
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 11:07 PM
There may or may not be a reason for that.
*Need somewhere special to put your pen? Why not shove it in my dog's ass?*
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 8:47 PM
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 7:58 PM
Saturday, February 10, 2007
If you must know, email me.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 9:44 PM
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 9:27 PM
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Monday, February 05, 2007
It was a blustery day.
There was snow everywhere.
About 4 inches of it was resting peacefully and undisturbed on my car.
I am getting ready for work.
I decide that I should clean the car off before I dry my hair.
I go out in a pair of fleece pants, no bra, a hoodie, and a coat.
Armed with car keys and a heavy duty scraper, I begin the tedious task of brushing/scraping Carl.
Once task is complete, I replace scraper, lock the car door, and proceed to shuffle towards my front door.
Instead of making it safely to the warmth of my apartment, I end up somehow laying tits up in the middle of the street.
I had slipped on a patch of invisible ice.
My legs went out from under me, my arms flail, and I land on my tailbone.
The vision you are undoubtedly picturing is not unlike that of a baby giraffe taking its first steps.
I lay in the middle of the street for a few more moments before somewhat hurridly picking my frail and battered 87 year old body off the road.
I shuffle to the door in agony.
I complete the drying of my hair, all the while cursing like a trucker.
My back still hurts like hell today.
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 10:17 PM
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Fitted By The Boob Lady at 8:38 PM