Monday, July 24, 2006

I rescind my thank you to Oprah...

Remember my thank you to Oprah the other day for all of the business her bra show sent to my small boutique?

I take it back.

Wholeheartedly.

It's hard to thank someone when she is single-handedly responsible for bringing the entire city's population of card carrying short bus riders into your store.

Honest.

It all started with the onion soup lady. Honest to Christ, she smelled like onion soup mix. And wanted me to fit her for a bra with her shirt off.


Oh. My. God.

When I asked her what size bra she was wearing, she couldn't tell me because she wasn't sure. I soon saw why.

The "sports bra" (And I use the quotes loosely) she was wearing was see-through thin. And worn to shit. It was so stretched, her boobs were hanging somewhere near or on her waist band.

While trying to simultaneously not laugh and/or gag, I covered her circumference with my measuring tape and quickly got the numbers I needed.

I put her in a couple of bras that matched the measurements I took and tried and tried to get her in one that would be suitable. In the end, I didn't have a bra in the store to fit her properly.

The rest of my day was pretty similar to the onion soup lady. Unfortunately, the day soon came to a close and I got, I mean, had to go home.

It's a shame really.


1 comment:

Big Orange said...

wow... is there some sort of complicated mathematical formula you use to calculate bras in this sort of instance? You know, L x 1/2H = A or something like that??

The things we have to put up with while @ work...